


She Doesn't Hold it Against Her

by tigereyes45



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, Grief/Mourning, I activated 'THAT' support right after 'THAT' event, Jeralt dies, So yeah here is the result of that, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-29
Updated: 2019-08-29
Packaged: 2020-09-29 20:20:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20441942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tigereyes45/pseuds/tigereyes45
Summary: Byleth tries her best just to listen. She strains her ears to hear all her student has to say. It doesn't make it any easier. With every word, her faith is strained. Her own grief trying it's hardest to leak out.





	She Doesn't Hold it Against Her

Byleth knows it was just an emotional day. Jeralt had just died. Their teacher’s demeanor completely changed. She broke down and cried in front of them. The murderers had escaped. It had been a stressful day. Her students could have died. Leonie had been at the front lines on her new horse steed. She had seen it all. Faced it all. She could have died. Instead, she watched Jeralt die in Byleth’s arms.

Byleth reminds herself that as Leonie screams at her. As accusations fly about how he treats Jeralt, well treated him now. He was dead after all, but some of Leonie’s words make it sound as if he isn’t. As if she still had a chance to go back and fix things with him. As if she could bring him back to Leonie.

She never forgets that Jeralt was her father. She did, however, forget that Byleth was still her teacher. Her elder. How much elder none of them knew, but it doesn’t excuse her behavior. Byleth did. When Leonie was finished she let her student go. She watched her run all the way back to the stables, or perhaps she was taking a longer route to her room. Byleth wasn’t really sure where Leonie was running, only that this was the only way.

She walked back to her own bedroom. Re-evaluating every choice that led them here. If they had just made a few different decisions would her father still be alive? Would he take her away from the Monastery again? Or would they have never agreed to come in the first place?

Her legs grew heavy as she walked the steps. Byleth wasn’t tired. She wasn’t having another spinning spell. Yet every move took so much strength from her that she barely retained before. When she reaches the entrance to her room her whole body slides to her right. Her flesh crumples up against the door panel.

She was left there. Her eyes were barely able to look in on the dark room. She was there for so long that even the sun had set. Still, she could see the outline of her bed, the shelves, and her desk. Her stuff. How easily she had accepted that they were hers. How easily the Monastery and the students had accepted her. Why? Why did they give her this place? Why didn’t they let her and father go? Why couldn’t she just stand up and get to her bed? She wants to rest, and sleep, and never wake up again. She could in here. No one could bother her here. It was the only time in her life that she ever had a room to herself.

Sure she had had tents to herself before. A tent isn’t a room. Her father and she had stayed at inns or with some villagers they had helped before. They always shared a room. Jeralt never liked having her out of his sight when it came time to rest. A few times he had let it slip that she was almost kidnapped once as a child. She didn’t even scream. Just smacked at the man. If she hadn’t smacked him, her father never would have woken up. She would have been gone.

She wishes it was her that was gone instead.

Then Leonie wouldn’t be so distraught. Then it wouldn’t matter that she couldn’t bring herself to stand. Then her father would have finally been free of her. Then it wouldn’t have mattered if the Divine Pulse didn’t work. Then there wouldn’t be so many tears to fall.

If only it had been her instead.


End file.
